Is it you or is it me?

Round 15, 2022
Sydney Swans 3.1, 4.6, 9.10, 12.11 (83)
St Kilda 1.2, 2.2, 2.6, 4.8 (32)
Crowd: 31,513 at the SCG, Saturday, June 27th at 7.25pm
By Tom Briglia


Is this it? If the end for 2022 is what I think it is, then we’re somewhere towards the end of the beginning of the end.

A few weeks ago we sat in the top four and the competition was beginning to open up. An A+ on Fox Footy’s mid-year grades. Maybe we were in with a shot of playing off for a Grand Final. Brett Ratten’s contract extension was a fait accompli on Footy Classified, tempting the Footy Gods damned. Mid-March thoughts of #Clarko2023 were a distant memory. Simon Lethlean came out on Monday and told us they still are.

We’d all lashed out at the AFL for trying to push the floating fixture on us and then going ahead and giving lowly Essendon three consecutive Friday night games, especially two against top four challengers Carlton and St Kilda.

The slide has been fast. After Mitchito and D-Mac were knocked out against the Lions and we spluttered to a 21-point loss, Kane said we could be the “vulnerable” team in the eight. Eddie floated us as a candidate for Tasmania. Max King was downgraded a little from a matchwinner to “what Max King needs to do to terrify defenders”. Some bad misses between he and Snags against the Lions had them both back in 2021 calamity territory, and now Snags has been dropped altogether, playing in a game with no scoreboard and filmed by one camera and partially obscured by a tree (thank you Rory and Michael for updates) It’s been a bad few days for the cyptocurrency enthusiast.

Of course, it was against the Bombers that things really came undone; the club that will always dick us no matter where the two teams are on the ladder (and we’re facing them in the VFLW Grand Final this Sunday). Last year was never going to be the same with the Round 3’s 75-point hammering in the back of our minds, and 2022 isn’t going to be the same either now after what we dished up against the 16th-placed team with two wins. Instantly the season turned from a top four challenge to missing out on the finals. This team was supposed to be more resilient than 2021. We thumped through five goals to roar back to level terms against the Bombers before they ended up outscoring us for the quarter and the half anyway. So disappointing was the loss that the club’s communications team got Tim Membrey to address the fans directly on the club website post-match rather than have him interviewed. There was no Uncut video for the first time this season. The peripheral buzz of anticipation for what this season and this team might become was just…gone. Crunch Time raised the prospect of losing six in a row. We were the “‘Broken’ Saints”, according to the Fox Sports clickbait headline. “Ratten revealed the football department delivered some home truths to the playing group during a brutal review at the start of the week” after a performance the club “didn’t see coming”, apparently. Luke Hodge for some reason gave us a chance and said we should back in Brett Ratten, but by Sunday night Mark Robinson declared we should be putting those talks on hold

Talk about 2022 ambitions had shifted to maybe scraping into finals this year and then to beyond 2022 entirely in the form of picking up Jordan de Goey, which Ratten opened the door right open for during the week. As if – as if – there is any sort of universe or dimension or worldline in which Jordan de Goey going to St Kilda works out well. As if.

***

Absolutely no one was feeling any better about the Saints by the time the weekend had officially even started. On Friday, Essendon had lost to the hapless Eagles, and the Dogs had beaten Hawthorn, knocking us out of the eight. But here we were, an excellent chance to bounce back and show everyone we’d learned something from by far our worst performance of the season with a game against a tough opposition on their home deck to keep in touch with the raft of teams in equal second.

The frantic opening few minutes was a good enough start, but as everyone settled into the game, Hamish in the Channel 7 commentary box called “McCartin to get the Saints going”, and in that moment it made sense our number one draft pick was going to be a big presence in our forward line. What else is there to say that hasn’t already been said about Paddy McCartin and St Kilda?

Really, the Swans had the game on their terms from the start. They dominated territory and their ball movement had some fluidity. Bad signs again for our own ball movement were there, on the occasion we got our hands on the ball. Players were stopping and propping. Marshall caught former Saint and Hard Quiz answer Tom Hickey holding the ball at centre-half-back and hit up Long forward of the wing but then play ground to a halt. We didn’t know what the hell to do with it even when we had clean possession. On the occasion we did get some looks up forward we weren’t making the most of it. Max dropped an easy Brad Crouch hit-up that would have been a shot at goal 30 metres out. He then found it on the lead for a longer shot that went directly out of bounds on the full.

It was looking like one of those nights where we make every one of the opposition look that little bit better. Not that he needs the extra boost but Buddy was playing some of his best footy. On the 50-metre arc he outdid both Wilkie and Dougal, working off both and reacting fastest to the popped-up ball, wheeled around and nailed a precise kick to Heeney for the Swans’ second. Ryan Clarke by the second quarter had two goals for just the second time in this career; the last time was when he was playing with North against – you guessed it – the Saints. Nick Blakey ended up with a career-high disposal count. It’s a service we provide, from gifting yet another player a Rising Star nomination to continue our best-in-the-business record the previous week, to opening things up for the guy who’s hardly played for two years, to the all-time great. Meanwhile, we had our best player this year Sinclair reading the ball beautifully in defence before slipping onto his arse when he kicked it.

Sharman was at least trying to make something happen and flying for everything; but in Ryder’s absence he was taking occasional forward line ruck duties and being thrown around by Hickey. Steele missed after a great contest by Windhager at ground level (one of the few in the forward 50 on the night) and the ball went straight down the other end, with Buddy again in the pocket grabbing it from the fall and snapping a goal. Buddy helped set up two more entries and another pinpoint hit-up of Heeney, dragging Dougal right across our defensive half of the ground. When Howard got it he did his now customary dance to get himself in trouble (it wouldn’t be the only time on the night). Cuts to the Swans bench showed a calm interchange. I’m not sure what the Qatar Airways billboards behind the players and the Swans “Mark of the Week – presented by Qatar Airways” would have thought about the Pride Match concept.

The ball movement wasn’t improving as the quarter wore on. It was either stilted movement, long down the line, iffy entries to no one in particular’s advantage with not many at the fall.  Gresham off half-back blazed away with a rushed high ball to an outpointed Membrey on McCartin, instead of running it through the middle with the three teammates immediately around him.

***

The second quarter was an arm wrestle, but there weren’t any signs we would be the ones to break things open. Buddy was prominent again; he spoiled Marshall and the Swans were away, handballing in numbers. He had another shot at goal on the 50-metre arc that was wayward, but a five-metre kick at the resulting scramble landed with Ryan Clarke in front of goal and was paid a mark. Clarke had been tagging Sinclair to good effect, and when he kicked the goal the Swans went to Sinclair and there was some push and shove. Nice to see NWM getting involved in it all, but we were borderline getting bullied.

That was the Swans’ only goal for the quarter, but going forward we were still mostly lifeless, or just making bad mistakes. Sharman had a few almost-moments, NWM missed him by himself 40 metres out directly in front, and then Sinclair finally worked off Clarke, intercepted a ball forward of the wing, ran with the footy and then delivered a perfect kick to Cooper 30 metres out but he let go of it under only a slight bit of heat. A few moments later we managed to put together a decent foray forward along the wing that elicited “One of the few times the Saints have been able to execute basic skills” from Wayne Carey, and the ball ended up with Sharman on a relatively difficult angle. Sharman’s kick squirted comically out on the full.

We were barely hanging in. Seb Ross had 17 touches with 11.39 still to play, Steele was settling in nicely and Rowan Marshall was doing OK, but that was mostly it. Missed opportunities from the Swans were the only thing really keeping us in it. Twice sharp kicks going forward hit Webster instead of a Swan, one hit NWM, and Sam Reid had a shot at goal touched on the line, and McDonald missed from the pocket.

A breakthrough of sorts came courtesy a very, very soft 50-metre penalty, with Membrey brought up into the 50-metre arc after Errol Gulden vaguely ran sort of near the edge of the protected zone. The umpire gave a short 50 – possibly the same umpire who paid the full 15 metres for the kick that ended with Clarke’s second goal – but Membrey kicked it anyway. Wayne Carey tried jinxing things by saying with six and a half minutes left the Saints players would be looking at the scoreboard thinking how lucky we were to be just 14 points down, and then Luke Darcy did similar with two minutes to go, and just as he did Logan McDonald had another shot and hit the post.

After kicking 3.3 in the first half last week we went in to the main change this week at 2.2 (as we did in the infamous 2002 draw against the Swans). We were in a much worse position on this night but still in touch on the scoreboard. Max was absolutely nowhere near it, but according to Swamp he does lead the competition for points in the third quarter, so we did have that up our sleeve. Nice try trotting all this out after Geelong and Richmond.

***

There was the briefest of flashes at the very beginning of the third that maybe we’d have a hot start to the second half as we did against the Bombers. But Sharman was outpointed from the opening bounce centre clearance, Hunter Clark gave away a terrible 50, and Papley kicked a goal from 50.

A lot of our contested work wasn’t terrible. We just didn’t know what to do with the footy, and the Swans were set up beautifully behind the ball. We didn’t want to take a half-risk. No movement ahead of the ball, no changing of angles, no forward handballs, just long kicks down the line. Max had moved a little higher up and finally got his hands on the footy a couple of times on the wing. Sharman almost took mark of the year, but those seemed to be only semblance of game plan we had. Sinclair looked like he’d been moved from half-back, and there genuinely was a few minutes in which the pressure was up; ten tackles in the first six minutes of play after just eight in the second quarter. But the margin for error was slim, and we didn’t look like scoring. What we probably feared deep down coming into this was happening – Paddy McCartin (together with his brother Tom) was mopping up. Brett Ratten said in the post-match press conference that he felt for Max because of the delivery into the forward, which probably said a lot about what the coaching staff thought about what went wrong. GT absolutely hated that approach and said so on Twitter as he unloaded on the club in the aftermath, and then he went ahead and had a crack at Max on 3AW.

Marshall and Sharman spoiled each other on the wing and not long after it looked like Sharman was moved behind the ball. Byrnes found Billings just inside 50 on a 45-degree angle. It was time for him to step up and be the pick three we made him. He didn’t get anywhere near it. The Swans finally broke the game open when a Ross handball (one of the few times we actually tried working in numbers) on the wing went straight to the Swans, Buddy drew a front-on contact from the Warner entry and Heeney kicked an easy goal from the advantage call. The pressure on the defenders had reached breaking point and the dose was repeated with McDonald drawing a free for too high and Papley kicked another from the goal square. Another anxiety-riddled interstate performance. Add it to the list.

Saints players were starting to get frustrated. Ben Long went the torpedo from a kick-out that went straight to Gulden, drawing the ire of Steele, and seconds later Max gave away a free-kick dumping Hickey well after he’d handballed. The Swans were off and Florent kicked an excellent running goal. They went straight out of the middle for a bullet pass to Hayward and another major. The game had broken open. Wilkie got dumped in a Heeney tackle and copped a massive one in the balls.

It was about this time that morbid curiosity took over. If there’s anything I like as much as footy jumper designs (there probably isn’t), then it’s novelty score lines. In modern footy, anything two goals or below qualifies as a novelty scoreline. Teams often shit out third, fourth or fifth goals late when the sting has well and truly left the game. Max finally got some space on his opponent and found a set shot and missed. Butler missed a snap and we went into the final change at 2.6, our lowest three-quarter time score against the Swans since 1920 (funnily enough, the final score ended up being the exact same as that Lakeside Oval game 102 years ago).

We’d responded to our worst performance of the year with our worst performance of the year.

***

I’d tell you to ignore everything about the last quarter if we played well; I’d also use a poor last quarter for some more whinging material in this review, so they weren’t going to get much from me from that point. What if I just…turned it off? Can I do that? Heeney on his own drew level with the Saints early on in the last quarter. There was still time for Zak Jones to earn a free and kick it straight to Paddy McCartin, and then get it back immediately from the rebound kick that went out on the full and kick it directly to Tom McCartin, before Paddy plucked a third McCartin intercept mark in a row moments after. Elsewhere, Dougal almost did his own knee and groin in one movement trying to again get around an opponent.

Billings and Windhager (from a Gresham throw) disappointingly kicked goals in the last few minutes. Until then, we were set to post our lowest score since Round 16 of 1957 when we could only muster 1.5 (11) against that year’s premiers Melbourne, and we were also set to kick just two goals in a game since a 140-point loss to Carlton at Moorabbin early in 1985. There were records out there to be taken off the shoulders of people who weren’t getting paid hundreds of thousands of dollars to dish this sort of stuff up. Certainly not under the pretence of top four challengers, and certainly not under the pretence of everyone being so shocked about what happened the week before against a team with two wins to its name. There were some smaller feats claimed. It was Brett Ratten’s lowest score as a head coach, taking in two clubs across 10 different seasons. Max was goalless for the first time since May 29th last year – 392 days earlier.

Last year after the Sydney game we supposedly had a meeting that was acknowledged as a turning point in the season. It’s less acknowledged that we put in a stunning choke in Cairns against the Crows the week after, and then took some time away in the mid-season bye. Is this a reverse 2021? This time, apparently in the bye week we all got together and had a really good earnest chat about how we can turf the season in just a few weeks. Twitter and BigFooty are giving up. And why the hell not? We spent the best part of three months learning to trust the club again, and it’s been wiped in three weeks.

We’re now sitting 10th with a very difficult draw, but as the week before showed it doesn’t matter where the opposition sits if we’re going to play boring, anxious footy. At half-time of Round 2, when we sat at 2.7, if we weren’t the worst team in the competition, we were the worst-placed team in the competition. We might be somewhere back around there if our form doesn’t change any time soon.

Winter is coming

Round 14, 2022
St Kilda 2.1, 3.3, 8.4, 11.6 (72)
Essendon 4.5, 7.7, 13.11, 15.17 (107)
Crowd: 33,274 at Marvel Stadium, Friday, June 17th at 7.50pm
By Lethal

“Should be a win for the Saints on Friday night, yeah”, I’m asked. In response, I give them the look. “I’m a Saints supporter; I’m never fully confident”.

We’ve all had these chats with friends or colleagues. Do they know that they’re probably tempting the fate of the Footy God’s when saying such things? For the most part, no. You can forgive them for posing such questions. On paper, and taking in even the most surface level footy information, this was surely a contest of two teams of starkly different ambitions. Plus, no Darcy Parish.

But this is the Saints – we turn any game into a banana peel game. And this is the Essendon Football Club. They’ve bullied us; they troll us, regardless of where the teams sit on the ladder, for decades now.

As soon as I confronted having to actually write this the impulse was right there to contrast this horrendous loss to the corresponding fixture in Round 3 last year. On that occasion, it was a 75-point drubbing, but it may as well have been 100 points plus given how gobsmacked it left Saints fans at the ground. It felt like a bumper crowd (29,234 in actual fact), but that may have been accentuated by the fact that it was only my second in-person footy experience since the Pandemic had set in, and so like most, I was super hyped. St Kilda had started off in a so-so fashion so far that year, having defeated the Giants in a drizzly game interstate, before a shoddy effort against the Demons at Corporate Stadium. St Kilda’s injury list was already worrying and significant (Ryder, Marshall, Gresham etc), Crouch suspended too, and so most fans had largely ignored any warning signs of tumultuous waters ahead, to that point. The goodwill of 2020 had spilled over nicely. Round 3 was a complete smack in the face. It was the type of loss that can suddenly make you re-evaluate everything to do with the Club. What’s been going on over summer? Does the Coach actually have a grip on what’s happening? What does this team stand for? Is Steele actually made for the captaincy gig? It was like the mask had been ripped off of the 2021 Saints. Claims to the effect of “we’ll get Jones / Crouch / Ryder” back in the side all felt empty. Something had become rotten at the core. The word rudderless keeps coming to mind. 

This time around and again the Bombers are the bullies stealing our chocolate milk.

This loss cuts differently though. Spud’s game. On Friday Night Footy – we don’t get many. But also, the stakes in a football sense were so much higher compared to that Easter Saturday train-wreck. Going into the mid-year BYE, all things aside, we had put ourselves in a strong position to claim a finals spot. Coming into Friday Night, for Spud’s game, having absorbed the bulk of the Footy’s world media spotlight, we were 8-4 and in need of a win to solidify our position in the light of the battles on the horizon. A win here and we can get on the front foot before diving head first into a gauntlet of games against finals aspirants Sydney, Carlton, Freo and the Dogs. It’s the hope that twists the knife.

The Club has known that Winter Is Coming for several weeks now. Making hay while the sun is shining has been front of mind, and the Bombers presented a calm before the storm in terms of the second half of the year. “We have invented ways of stuffing things up” – a paraphrased Grant Thomas. 2022 has been an improved year, all things considered and the win-loss attests to that. Yet, I think even the most one-eyed Saint would agree that the Saints don’t have the luxury of playing with a ‘flick the switch’ mentality. This season has contained several victories, where contributions from 22 players (or close to) has been the order of the day. In Winks, Gresh – and to a lesser extent Snags – this side does contain wildcards, the quality of which we haven’t possessed for literally 10 years. Nonetheless, this side’s modus operandi has been to control the footy, work the ball forward, be defensively minded across the ground and allow our defence to set up higher up the ground. This, alongside periods where we play-on more readily and utilise our halfbacks to kickstart forays forward. But our commitment to the defensive structures has always underpinned the other parts of the game.

At a fundamental level, the Bombers game was a chance to actually bounce back to form after a frustrating trip to Brisbane. Slice it any way you like, we led the ladder leaders by two goals at half-time on their home deck. It was far from a standout performance, but especially early on we were on top and showed we could mix it with the more fancied Lions. The rest of the game descended into frustration, both in the way we wilted around the ball (hello, massive inside 50 loss) and in the casualties that we suffered along the way. 

Does this team have a deer-in-the-headlights problem? Corporate Stadium was heaving in Round 1; overflowing with the black and white army. Saints fans were more sheepish in their anticipation. I mentioned to Tom at the time that there was a pretty strong chance of us “shitting the bed” in light of the spotlight and the occasion (see: actual significant numbers of fans at a game). What muddies this discussion is that this team hasn’t been good enough to work itself into many games of significance over the last several years. Does Seb Ross play well in big games? Well, hell how do we know – we’ve barely played in a handful of “Big Games” since 2011’s Elimination Final. 

Perhaps the most frustrating aspect of the night for me was that, as much as we seemed off from essentially the get-go, at half-time you were still left thinking that the game was still right there for the taking. The Bombers had “come to play”, and their ability to put speed on the ball had seemingly stoked the Saints CBF vibes, but the Saints had ample chances to hit the scoreboard. Blatant skill errors, ragged movement, over complicated disposal in the forward 50, all conspired to us squandering countless chances up forward. The Dons were the better side, but their somewhat cavalier approach to bolting forward had also revealed so many holes for us to poke through when having ball in hand. 

It only took a minute into the third term for the Saints to strike. Skunk was re-instated to the forward line after having been deployed as a loose man across defence in the second term. But it was Marshall, another anonymous figure in the first half, who out-muscled Ridley to take an excellent grab. He celebrated the set shot with a 300-esque flex. This was a play that actually looked like it was plucked from the training ground: the behind the goal camera showing Marshall dart around Long in a horizontal U-shape, in turn letting Long put in a half screen for RoMa’s man. The Saints then kicked the next four by way of Ryder, Long, Latte, and Snags. This was all within a 7 minute spurt. Even the umpires were swept up in the momentum of it, Billings and Snags both on the end of extremely fortunate umpiring decisions. 

This patch was a blitzkrieg and by the time Snags kicked the fifth of that bunch, we were one point in front. Yet the Dons weren’t completely shaken. Our bubble was feebly burst by Stringer’s arching long-bomb set shot from 53 metres out. Such a fitting party-pooper. This was the first of 5 consecutive from the Dons to close out the quarter – including another from the The Package, this time on the left foot. Like a lot of the year, St Kilda’s centre square work seemed mostly like a roll of the dice. There’s no coverage for when we don’t win the initial scrimmage or tap. Once the Dons had weathered the initial storm in the middle, the patterns of the first half re-emerged. Too often Saints players getting caught ahead of the ball and too often the Dons being able to spread the ball easily out of contested situations. 

*****

Gresham was awarded a free for “insufficient intent” (see: deliberate out of bounds) and duly kicked a nice Stevie J deep into the last term to bring it back to a five goal margin. That was his third of the night to go with 31 disposals. Through the start of the third term he was one of the spark plugs around the ball that started shifting the momentum of the game. This only slightly made up for the fact that it was his spontaneous, reckless switch across goal that rolled-out the red carpet for the Dons to intercept and waltz into their first goal of the night early in the first term. Those mindless moments are what can drive you crazy sometimes when watching Gresh. Finding the balance between spontaneous brilliance and trying to do too much continues to be a process with him. 

Another player that stood out was Josh Battle. He was resolute in defence, plugging holes on the last line several times. He’s been Mr.Consistent this year and his efforts through the year have probably been somewhat overshadowed by the similarly consistent Cal Wilkie. Once or twice JB was caught out trying to outjump Draper or Two Metre Peter, but he was stranded on such occasions. The back six was laid bare so many times with the ball moving between the arcs at light speed without a semblance of pressure on the ball carriers.

For all the inevitable fanfare, neither Clark or Billings came away having solidified a position in the 22. Latte did snag a beautiful, spontaneous banana snap goal in the second term – one of the Saints’ three majors for the half. He added to his tally with a second as part of the third quarter blitzkrieg – a set shot was from the goal line after a contender for worst 50 metre penalty of the year. (Guelfi supposedly breached the “Outside 5” protected zone rule. If that’s a 50 metre penalty, then the umpires are missing about 100 a game). Jack’s impact outside of his two goals was minimal if any. He seemed to be played predominantly through the midfield, yet you didn’t see him reach or impact many contests at all. More worryingly for Saints fans is that Latte’s projected major elite talent (his kicking) seems to regularly desert him these days. Case in point, Latte had a free-kick dead on centre-wing in second term and with all the time in the world, including a 5×5 “outside 5” radius of space around him, he managed to kick the ball a metre above Max King’s head in the forward pocket, despite their being 10 metres in front of Max begging to be utilised. Max’s finger tips couldn’t pull the mark in. Another foray scuppered.

The most curious aspect of this Billings thread to the season is that Jack was re-signed for a further four years only several months ago – as good a symbol as any that Latte is part of the Club’s short term future and building towards a flag tilt, right? But by round 10 this year, it had become plainly evident that his spot in the best 22 was questionable at best. Despite some big numbers at Sandy, Latte only managed to be included for the Adelaide game before being dumped back to the Zebras. That performance against Adelaide? Aside from two impactful moments in the final term he laboured. It’s been a pretty telling shift in sentiment towards the former Pick #3. Perhaps, the Club did not see the rookie trio (Windy, Nas, and Mitchito) having such an impact on the Seniors this early. Perhaps they didn’t envisage they would be as physically ready as they have been. Perhaps the early inclusion of Nas, and a more consistent and spry Hill, has opened the Coaches eyes to the benefits of a midfield mix with a little more in the way of dash and polish. Latte is unquestionably talented, but I think the door has well truly shut on him living up to Pick 3. Can he become a serviceable AFL player? If he is to be played up forward more permanently, then will he discover a way to impact the game when he doesn’t have the ball?

*****

At the BYE, I went through each of the remaining games in the fixture and I couldn’t quite settle on whether we’d finish with 12 or 13 wins. Having now played Essendon, I’d say we will finish with 12 wins. Will that be enough for the Finals? Probably not, given that the Pies and Richmond both have significantly smoother runs towards September. The Pies do finish with two tough fixtures though. Of course, this is all hinging on the Saints form and health – particularly the former. If we were to recapture our best form, then 13 or 14 wins is not out of the question at all. The ladder is tight. Incidentally, as part of my 12 win prediction I had pencilled us in for a loss this week. That said, the Swans form has recently nosedived.  

Presuming he’s at close to 100 percent, the return of Steele next week as well as Murmurs McKenzie (surely) and the availability of Mitchito, would mean that from a health perspective the Saints are in as good a position as they could hope with over half the season gone. Geary was shaping as a possible inclusion but a shoulder injury again has him on the sidelines. 

This makes for further selection dilemmas as we dive into the depths of June and July. What mix of small forwards are needed? Does Nas’ outside polish overshadow his inadequacies without the footy in hand? Can Sharman be played alongside King, Membrey and Ryder or Marshall? This type of depth has not been seen at Moorabbin since 2011. It’s a welcome sight.

Resident Cryptocurrency magnate Snags Higgins I think should be closest to the chopping block. Every time he didn’t mark the ball on Friday Night, he was either on all fours or he was left in the wake of his opponents. Indications from the bulls and bears in the market is that SnagsCoin is at a yearly low, but I’m not buying. Speaking of bulls, The Ben Long Experience has earnt the right to be up forward full-time. It lets him lean into his maniacal tendencies. He’s become a barometer of our pressure gauge and is one of the few players from Friday Night that relished that part of the game. Butler’s ball use was at its rollercoaster worst, and so his omission wouldn’t shock me either. Ryan Byrnes was apparently out there too; definitely seemed to be playing at VFL pace. Would the match committee be tempted into giving Kent a run, as a statement as much as anything? 

Historically Ratts and the match committee have tended to give players more than 1 game to prove themselves before pulling the trigger on omission. Though the Billings omission after Adelaide perhaps signalled a shift in policy this year – particularly in regards to established players who should know their role. My gut tells me that Clark gets another week before the selection microscope zones on him properly. Problem is, that the Saints finals chances are officially on the clock. Round 15 – a mini final. Round 15 last year saw us reduce the still finals aspiring Tigers to 2.10 (22) and an emphatic victory at the G. This week requires a similar return to respecting the defensive aspects of the game.   

Snack of Choice (SoC) of the round [SPONSORSHIP PENDING]

  • N/A. I was at a bar and so snacks were sidelined, and instead wine was being consumed. Quite a bit of it.

Selection table radar

  • Who would I actually drop for this week? It’s a really tricky one. McKenzie and Steele must be back in. Byrnes, Snags, Clark, Billings and Nas all should be put heavily under the microscope. Probably Butler too – why not I guess.
  • Paton has struggled for at least the last 3-4 games. I’m not sure there’s a ready made replacement to come in. Leo Conolly hasn’t been exactly thumping the door down. I don’t see Highmore as a like-for-like.
  • Has Zak Jones actually done much this year? He’s meant to be one of our x-factor players. Very nondescript season from Zak and needs to do more.

It’s a knockout

Round 13, 2022
Brisbane Lions 2.4, 3.6, 7.10, 10.18 (78)
St Kilda 2.1, 5.6, 7.7, 8.9 (57)
Crowd: 26,610 at the Gabba, Saturday, June 11th at 7.25pm
By Rory Sackville

Picture: Russell Freeman

I was in foreign territory for this game, at my brother’s place with my Dad, on a cold June Saturday night. The Saints were back in foreign territory too, but at the same time it probably felt a bit like home after the two pandemic-affected seasons left us in Qld for a majority of them both. The Gabbatoir was in boss mode like it was 2001, the Lions winning 24 of the past 27 games there going back to 2019. Our last game there against them? A hard-fought two-point loss in “peak pandemic” 2020. 

I really do hate interstate games, especially at night. You just feel helpless. It’s like you have no influence or input on the game, as opposed to if you were there. It’s just you, whoever else is in the room with you, and the commentators. 

The commentators, including Brisbane Lions legend and board member, Leigh Matthews, didn’t provide for much Saints influence or input in the pre-game either. Well, at least there was a pre-game this time, unlike the last Saturday night interstate game versus Adelaide where the broadcast started at 7.24pm and 50 seconds. Over on Fox, it wasn’t much better, with Brisbane Lions legend, Jonathan Brown, providing his usual, middle-ear reverberating, sub-tonal “uhrgs” and “ahrgs”. St Kilda legend Nick Riewoldt seemed to be lulled into the Brisbane narrative too.

Mitch Robinson was back in the side (more on the “Mitch Robinson react face” later”), which reminded me of something I’d left out of my The Juggernaut Era article earlier in the week – his punch on with Gardi outside Eve nightclub … those heady days … 

Joe “Joey” Daniher was also back in the side – another portent of what was to come; the Saints are always on the receiving end of star players coming back into the side or getting up from injury the week before (hello to Darcy Parish who will most definitely line up against us on Friday night).

Roaming Ro was also back (note: I didn’t even know it was a thing) – this is what social media content 2022 style looks like – the biggest insight we got was (unconfirmed rumours) that Doogs sweats when he plays video games.

The Accountant (*checks the ledger*) was installed as Captain – our fourth captain in four weeks. He walked out to the toss with Windy.  “They’re changing the karma of the club”, says my Dad, as Windy handed over a boomerang to Zorko in the now traditional pre-game ritual.

There’s always concern coming off a bye – will the players be flat? Or will they come out firing after a week’s break … well, at least it was the latter, after a string of early-season games where we couldn’t get on the scoreboard early. The Max King quarter was the first quarter, so it seemed, getting right on top of Harris Andrews. Max snared the first two goals of the game in his 50th of hopefully many games for the Saints. Kicking the first two goals of a game just seemed like an anomaly …

With Crouch going head-to-head with Neale, and Seb, Gresh, Windy and Owens running through the middle, we were getting on top of the Lions mids early  – but soon enough they were reading Paddy Ryder’s (still in that St Kilda jumper) hitouts to “advantage”, like they were reading a little kid’s book. Seb Ross’s inside-50 entries started to resemble 2019 Seb (clearly missing Steele in the middle), with his efforts plopping onto the Brisbane defenders’ heads. 

With second playing fifth leading into the game, there was always going to be a bit of heat in the game, and spot fires blew up around the ground at every juncture. Brisbane responded after three straight behinds with a goal through that man Joey, and then punctured by the rare double goal to Charlie Cameron (who had been well checked by first-half BOG Jimmy Webster), after a Brad Crouch indiscretion. Jack Higgins – whose head seems to be targeted in every game he plays – was shoved in the back (no free-kick), trying to kick a miraculous goal resulting in a behind, and we were down by three points at the first break.

The first quarter was littered with kicking errors from both sides, and misses at goal particularly by the home side. Fair to say there were more shanks than a LIV golf tournament. Looking at the stats sheet at quarter time showed that somehow Lienert (the sub) had more DT points than three players actually playing in the game.

So by now I was stress eating away. Snack of choice: a gigantic bag of Sprinters Plain Chips from Aldi with a smattering of old faithful SoC, Chicken Twisties. 

The second quarter wasn’t the Max King quarter, but it certainly belonged to the Saints – even with a little bit of luck from the “not-so-very-good-but-definitely-not-showing-any-dissent-to-them” umpires. A questionable (but on review and reflection ultimately correct) free for deliberate gave Gresh a goal from the goal square, and we were on top. Zorko either didn’t appreciate the gift given to him at the toss, or just doesn’t know what it means to be a strong leader, and gave away an abuse free-kick, and soon after shoved Higgins’ head into the turf.

Speaking of heads being shoved – this is where the game turned. We led by 12 points at the half after a great (but questionable – insert Mitch Robinson react face) mark by Murmurs McKenzie, but a few minutes before the end of the second, Mitch Owens’ daring style worked against him. He met Lincoln McCarthy head-on and got knocked out, ruling him out of the match (and the next one). We’d held the Lions to their lowest half-time score of the year.

Within two minutes of the third quarter starting, Murmurs was off with concussion, and our structure started to collapse. The Lions got the first two goals of the quarter; the first through Starcevich, after Gina the sub’s first possession was a roundhouse to his head, giving away 50, and subsequently, a goal. Halfway through the third quarter the inside 50s read 11-0 the Lions’ way. The game should have blown out much further than it did, but for some excellent defending by the back six/seven all game – especially Battle and Webster – and a couple of goal reviews going our way too.

A huge run by Buts in the middle of the ground (note: this was the stage I realised Hill was playing but more on this later), led to a typically hardworking Higgins goal (who was shoved in the back well after the kick … no free kick). Higgins works so hard to get back and get into position – he has such strong forward craft (and crypto investment skills). The Lions got a couple back, and then Gresh (who had been quiet) took on the game, and set sail from 50 to nail a cracking goal before three-quarter time. We had multiple shots at goal in the last couple of minutes of the quarter for no score. We just weren’t able to sneak ahead, but again – like quarter time – we were three points down. We were still in this game … or so we thought.

But at three-quarter time we got the news we were three players down with Jones off with a hamstring. The CEO-in-waiting gave an on-field interview, basically telling the world what our structure and game plan was going to be in the last quarter. Maybe keep him off the mic mid-game once he becomes CEO?

McCluggage – who in my mind was BOG – got the first of the last after a dropped mark by Hill (which reminded me again he was playing). Early in the last quarter the stats read 24-8 inside 50s after half-time the Lions’ way. There is no doubt losing Owens and then DMac (and then Jones) limited our rotations, and we just ran out of legs. The defenders never gave up though – they still gamely defended everything thrown at them; Capt Cal with a tremendous save on the last line of defence. With savings like that, I want Capt Cal to do my taxes at EOFY. 

In the end, we recorded the lowest amount of I50s of the year, but no goals from stoppages (see Ryder and his hit-outs to “adv” – won the hit-outs 31 to 25, but lost the clearances 34 to 25). We’re now sixth halfway through the season and, even with a tough run home (Brisbane, Sydney x 2, Freo, and Carlton – who are all in eight – all still to come), I think we’ll be thereabouts come season end. But 149 years of trust issues still linger.

It was later revealed that a few of the players including Hill, Wood and Higgins were all unwell, and it showed throughout the game. With the VFL game earlier in the day (side note: why? Why was the VFL game BEFORE the AFL game on the same day, especially interstate?), there was little that could be done. Losing three during the game and having a few players unwell was just too much to handle.  

On to Essendon, who are the most under the pump team in the comp. West Coast and North are cloaking the troubles at the Bombers … so that means the stage is set (remember those trust issues) … we will have three forced changes, but here’s hoping Nas, Latte and Clark come into the side, and we get on the right side of the (checks notes) ledger.

The Juggernaut Era

In a special mid-season bye retrospective, we’re delving into the last time we were this good through the first-hand experiences of Rory Sackville.

Photo: Andrew White


For full disclosure, this is a first-hand account of the St Kilda Football Club 2007ish to 2011ish (aka the Ross Lyon era and – according to Lethal – from here on in known as The Juggernaut Era). I worked at the club in various middle management role during this time including sponsorship, community and fan engagement. Overall, I held various positions between 2004 and 2015. This is my account – to quote the reality TV quote de jour, “I’m speaking my truth”. Others who worked, played, were involved in the club during this time will have their versions of events and why things played out the way they did – that’s cool, I’m not trying to debunk anyone else and their version of events. These are my stories … dun dun …

***

2007 – New coach, who dis?

2007 brought Ross Lyon to the club in the battle of the 2005/06 Sydney assistant coaches. John Longmire was a frontrunner to win the top job after Grant Thomas’ departure but Rossy snared the top job. In my mind, this appointment was one of the first “just hire assistant coaches from successful teams” appointments – this approach carries on today. 2007 was a middling year where we hovered low-to-mid table for most of the season. The highlight of the year was the appointment of Nick Riewoldt as sole captain moving away from GT’s captain rotation policy – this was a wise move.  A late season draw to the equally low-to-mid-tabled Western Bulldogs and close losses to Collingwood and West Coast ultimately cost us a spot in the finals when Adelaide upset Collingwood in the final round at the now-known-as Concrete Disney Store to clinch eighth. In hindsight, whilst you want to make finals every year, this wasn’t a bad thing as Geelong were always going to win this one.

2008 – Can you smell what the Ross is cooking?

Something changed. The ninth-place finish spurred the team on. I’ve always believed a team needs a good year to settle into a new coach (and I’d seen GT into Ross into Watters into Richo), the 2011 Cats aside where C. Scott inherited a premiership team in waiting. 2007 was learning Rossy’s new game style – defensive, accountable, next man in – epitomised by the Rob Eddys, Andrew McQualters et al – getting to learn the ropes. 2008 showed us what they had learnt. The tone was set from Round 1 with a 6.15 to 6.13 win against Sydney – the apprentice defeats the master at his own game. Some of the old, pre-Rossy traits were still there though and by mid-season we were exactly where we were at 2007 season’s end – ninth. It looked like we were in for another middling season but we came home with the wet sail with a 7-2 run after Round 12 leading into the last game of the year against Essendon in seventh position. As per usual, the live ladder and its computations were in full swing in Round 22 as fourth to eighth spots were all up for grabs with the ridiculous “if North lose by more than 70 but Port score more than 140 and North score less than 70, Adelaide win and Saints win by 100-plus and Mercury is in retrograde … Saints will finish fourth” scenario being thrown around. By the last game of the round – the cursed 4:40pm Sunday slot – all the computations and live ladder scenarios had played out (not sure about Mercury in retrograde). If the Saints won by more than 100, we’d snag fourth spot and the double chance. Well, that happened too. The Saints won by 108 points kicking 7.6 to 0.1 in the last quarter in an absolute procession – Milney with seven including three in the last.  This was a sign of a team that was starting to believe … the additions of Sean Dempster (who did his knee very early in the Round 22 game and missed the finals and first half of 2009) and Adam Schneider – both Swans premiership players – brought experience and polish to a very talented side that had that delicate mix of youth, experience, talent and hard workers.

Geelong again looked unstoppable (which ultimately wasn’t true, all thanks to Stewie Dew) but easily accounted for us in the Qualifying Final – which totally made sense seeing we were in seventh place one week before the finals. Knocking off the Pies in the Semi-Final set up a Preliminary Final against the Hawks. This ultimately became Robert Harvey’s final game; he’d announced his retirement late in the season and was chaired off with two Brownlows, 380-plus games, umpteen accolades, but no flag. But – being completely honest and transparent – the players and certainly the club was nowhere near ready to play in a Grand Final. The murmurs went around the admin team after the game with words to the effect of “lucky we didn’t win that – we would have been nowhere near prepared to play in the big dance…”. No one remembers Preliminary Final losers anyway … all this did was set us up for quite literally the greatest home and away season put together by a side in the AFL era. A side note here – it’s been statistically proven (Footballistics) that the 2004 St Kilda side was the most accurate and potent side ever – I often reflect on 2004 as the one that really did get away but onto …

2009 – The Greatest Show, that wasn’t, man

I could spend countless words on 2009 – this whole retro could be on 2009 – 2009 made The Winning Streak DVD (2004) look like The Midday Movie. A club-unprecedented 19 wins in a row to start the season, the greatest home and away game ever, another McClelland Trophy for the cabinet and again accolades galore … but no flag. Off the back of the 2008 form and seeing Rossy’s game plan and style gelling with the team, the club knew it was in for a big year. 

I’ll spend a bit of time on the Round 14 v Geelong game – both teams undefeated by Round 13 (an AFL-era unprecedented feat) – in the years before the floating fixture, the AFL had got this one wrong at the start of the season scheduling the game on a Sunday afternoon. It didn’t deter anyone with a still-AFL, now-known-as-the-Concrete-Disney-Store-record 54,444 crowd. It was a TRUE sell-out by every stretch of the imagination. Every single person attending had to have a reserved seat and the club, the AFL and the stadium went out of their way to ensure every patron sat in their seat. This makes sense, but typically people just sit wherever they want (even in reserved seat areas) so the club had staff members patrolling the aisles to ensure that everyone was sitting in their allocated seats – including staff. The game itself was truly pulsating, right down to Gardy killing ironing out Harry Taylor taking the mark that ultimately led to a six-point win.

After the win the club was on the highest of highs. The show kept going until Round 20, after sneaking a one-point win in Sydney in Round 18 and accounting for the Hawks in Tassie whilst resting some key players in Round 19. Momentum is real, and we lost it. Close losses to Essendon and then North, and then a lacklustre 47-point win to the bottom-placed Melbourne leading into finals. There was never any doubt we were going to make the Grand Final but an unconvincing Qualifying Final win v Collingwood and a sneaky seven-point Preliminary Final win against the Bulldogs – we’d been behind all game, and snuck in front with seven minutes left, and a Nick Riewoldt toe-poke put the game out of reach with a minute or so to go.

Onto the Big Dance for the first time since 1997.

This time, the club – players, admin, members and fans – were all ready for it. Planning had started months earlier (mainly as no team that had been 13-0 had ever missed the Grand Final – so effectively we could have planned to play Geelong – no doubt the footy department were planning for this too!) – everything was falling into place to snare our first flag since 1966. We all know about Scarlett’s toe-poke (cringe), Hawkins goal hitting the post (double cringe – leading the rules being changed and goal reviews being introduced) but what hurt me the most was Max Rooke tumbling a goal in after the siren had sounded. We fell away so badly in the last quarter against a team that had our measure. I genuinely believe the wet weather did not help our game style and neither did not playing at the ‘G often enough (our first game of the year there was Round 22).

I’m of the view that every club restructures approximately every nine months or so, on and off the field. You don’t win the premiership? You’ve failed. Something has to give. The industry is brutal at best. Players go and more go, staff churn (at 11.5 years when I left I was the longest-serving administration staff member at the time – most come and go within one to two years), coaches’ contracts expire, and out the door they go. The club knew they were in the window, clock hands closest to the premiership, so they threw their first draft pick at a player who absolutely fit the bill of what we needed – outside run and some polish to support the defensive, in and under style of play. There are some brutal things I could say about Andrew Lovett (who was at the club for all of five minutes but somehow stuffed it up) but I’ll let a quick Google search cover that off for me. So let’s go to…

2010 – Bounce baby bounce

When you look back at the 2010 season there were some weird results and our performance throughout the year put us in a strong but never dominant position. I put this all down to losing Nick Riewoldt for half the season to a terrible hamstring injury in Round 3. Adding players such Adam Pattinson (a great bloke who I later met again outside of footy, but a solid, foot solider by his own admission) and Jesse Smith (who never, ever, ever got on the park but touted by many as the greatest ever half-back flanker that never was) and the aforementioned Lovett didn’t eventuate to the additional polish we needed to win a flag. A seven-game winning streak (six without Riewoldt) set the season up well finishing in third place – a game and half behind Geelong. That half a game? A draw against Hawthorn in the annual Blue Ribbon Cup. This game was a see-sawing affair. Usually when you are presenting a cup for the game the result is known as you make your way down to the field but we had no plan for if it was a draw. I watched the end of the game from the bowels of Docklands with the Chief Commissioner of Police Simon Overland, the CEO of the Blue Ribbon Foundation and other guests from the Silk and Miller families. I recall turning to the Chief Commissioner after the siren and saying, “Well, you’re the most senior person here – you make the call on who gets the cup!” – it made sense to give it back to the team that held it anyway (which was the Saints after the Max Hudghton-led 2009 win in Tassie).

Outside of the Qualifying Final win in Adelaide in 2005 (where the entire club was flown over to watch the game) – I think the 2010 Qualifying Final result was my favourite finals win, beating Geelong by four points in a thriller (this is in the back any day of the week). Another classic game between the two sides, and some personal glory with my wife and her entire family being Geelong supporters. Seeing off the Bulldogs again in the Preliminary Final (by now you’re starting to feel sorry for the Bulldogs and their run in prelims 1997/98 and 2008/09/10 but then win one out of their-you-know-what in 2016), this sets us up for a Grand Final against … well, every team’s nemesis … Collingwood. This is officially the fourth-best Grand Final of all-time, epitomised by Brendon Goddard’s mark of the year and subsequent goal to put us a goal up with just under seven minutes to play. Lenny Hayes’ forgotten Norm Smith Medal performance of 32 touches, 12 tackle and a goal (and one lost voice) showed everyone the type of big-game player he was. Don’t forget he kicked it into the 50 for BJ’s huge mark and it was his kick that led to the game equalling point … that bounce … that f^%$ing bounce. It was widely viewed that we had spent our tickets in that game and the 56-point loss the next week proved it. Again, the AFL changed the rules not long after and a drawn Grand Final will never happen again.

And for the third time in three years, we beat the eventual premiers during the season all to no avail. And we all thought that not winning three Grand Finals in two years was the worst thing that could happen to the club.

Welcome to 2011.

2011 – Schoolgirls and Seaford and Dockers (oh my!)

Three major things occurred in 2011 (well, late 2010 and 2011). The “St Kilda Schoolgirl”, Seaford and Rossy leaving to go to the Dockers are all well reported. The worst thing was a combo of the first two with the “St Kilda Schoolgirl” turning up to the first training session at Seaford handing out provocative flyers. It wasn’t pretty stuff. The club’s response? Hide, hide and hide some more. In hindsight, this was the worst thing they did. They had just moved to the Frankston LGA and this was supposed to be an opportunity to open up the Bayside that we claimed we owned … but we hid. Hid from the media, hid from fans and members and hid from the community we were supposed to be embracing. I’d just taken over the club’s community engagement programs including things such as school visits and I recall a conversation with a senior club official who told me, in no uncertain terms, that we’d be doing the absolute bare minimum community engagement. This was not the way to engage with the local community and our fan base, certainly not a way to grow the club. This was all before the season had even started.

It was clear we had run out of petrol by 2011, the hangovers from the highs of 2009/10 and the offseason troubles including the NZ drug scandal (which I’d forgotten also happened in early 2011 such was the onslaught of off-field issues). The start to the season was disastrous – losing Lenny Hayes to an ACL in the Round 2 draw versus Richmond. By the mid-season bye we were 4-1-7 sitting in 12th position. The bye was a godsend – wet sail again – and we finished off the season 8-2, finishing in sixth. The oddity of finals and game locations meant not only did we have a home final against the Swans but it was an ACTUAL home final at the soon-to-be-known as the Concrete Disney Store. We couldn’t lose this one – we had momentum – but we did, and easily, thanks to an Adam Goodes and Ryan O’Keefe double act.

Four days later, Rossy was gone. Some say he double-crossed us, some say he walked out for money due to some issues, but we didn’t sign him when we had the chance. Negotiations went on and on but we didn’t get the signature. I happened to still be at the Linen House Centre in Seaford the night he walked out in a purple haze of bluff and bluster. It wasn’t a pretty start to the season; it wasn’t a pretty ending either.      

***

You look back at this era and it was the era of Victorian teams – 2007 to 2011 – Geelong, Hawthorn, Geelong, Collingwood and Geelong with Geelong, St Kilda twice, and Collingwood runners up (Port Adelaide being the outlier in 2007). We had our chances, but just couldn’t take them. It just wasn’t meant to be.

On this era you could easily script a mini-series apt for (insert one of the countless streaming services here) and have enough content focusing on the off-field components only. Maybe I’ll write a screenplay next?

After all this I’m but one a small handful of people who can proudly say they’ve worked at three Grand Finals in two years (and an even smaller handful of people who can say this AND worked at the first-ever AFL game played overseas for premiership points). It truly was The Juggernaut Era – let’s hope this is The Juggernaut Era Mk II.

So in it

Round 11, 2022
St Kilda 5.2, 6.5, 12.7, 16.7 (103)
North Melbourne 2.2, 2.3, 4.4, 7.8 (50)
Crowd: 23,464 at Docklands, Sunday, May 29th at 1.10pm


What was it with this week?

In the fortnight since I last waffled on about the Saints (thanks Rich for covering for me) and treated myself to a birthday trip to the magnificent Adelaide Oval and a rare win a) at the ground and b) against an Adelaide team anywhere, St Kilda came back into vogue. The media bandwagon had returned. Josh Gabelich was on. One day he was writing about  “Why it’s no longer panic stations at Saints” in the absence of Jack Steele, two days later it was former accountant Callum Wilkie is a “bounty hunter” that “might be the League’s most underrated player”. David King was back to breaking down our selfless running patterns up forward to give space for Max King (this time it was Zak Jones). After we eventually got past the Crows, David King frankly took it too far and said on Max, “I think If this guy lights up in September they can win it, there’s no doubt about that, they can win the flag”. Looking ahead, Damien Barrett went with ““a Marvel Stadium home game against the hapless North Melbourne presents as a fill-up for him in his Coleman Medal chances” in his Sliding Doors column that isn’t really about sliding doors moments.

Brett Ratten’s contract was a talking point. If you’d have told me we’d be taking about at the halfway point as we walked out of the Concrete Dome following the Collingwood loss I’d have assumed that he was gone and we were angling for #Clarko2023; instead we’re apparently looking at extending him as we sit in the top four at the midway point of the season. Dwayne opened the lines on Midday Madness wanting to hear more from us about it all. Talk about Rowan Marshall’s contract was enough to have him on 7 news. Ratts and David Rath did the sports radio rounds.

On On the Couch, Paddy Ryder himself (in a St Kilda polo) said he’s the third-best ruckman in the comp and quite openly said we’re aiming for top four by season’s end. So, surely, against second-last, struggling North Melbourne, here was a chance to show the maturity of the team. To be un-St Kilda-like. To do this without fuss, to get the job done, to dispose of a side that had lost their last six games by 68, 60, 50, 78, 69 and 47 points, with a 108-point loss before all of that.

Then Caro decided to bring back the North to Tasmania debate and Footy Classified trashed their recruiting, while Garry Lyon had put the umpires on notice by saying “Melbourne (against North) got the greatest run from the umpires I have seen for a long, long, long time”. Sam Edmund then reported that all of Mark Finigan, Glenn Luff and Ben Birthisel from the recruiting department had all handed in their resignations on Tuesday, “frustrated at the club over its management”, and he doubled-up with the goss revealing that Jason Horne-Francis travelled to Adelaide without the club knowing, and he may or may not have missed a game with a hamstring related to racking up frequent flyer points.

North got the moody vignette treatment on Tuesday’s 360 and Gerard called the club an “old-fashioned tyre fire”, before they got another howling vignette on the Wednesday. The ABC termed them “embattled”. There’s no conspiracy; but this would only happen to St Kilda. St Kilda, who had done most things right this year, was finally about to face a lower-rung team ahead of a steamy second half of the year, only to find that said struggler had surely engaged Us Against Them mode.

***

Then we decided to drop Jack Billings, and I wasn’t sure how much more this whole situation could be tempting fate. I say it every week, but we have 149 years of trust issues. All good to send a message to the players about accountability, but would we have dropped him if we were playing Melbourne or Brisbane or Fremantle or Carlton?

His on-paper replacement Mitchito had more of a presence at the first centre bounce than he did for the entirety of Round 1 with a tackle, smother, smothered clearance, getting down low to the ball, forcing another stoppage with a tackle on McDonald, and then getting down low and getting it out to Crouch for the clearance. That might have settled some nerves about personnel for the twitchier among us; this line-up had three guys in their first season, no captain, no Snags, no recently-returned pick 3. By afternoon’s end, we would be revelling in the fact.

Murmurs McKenzie has made a funny habit of bobbing up for our early goals over the past 12 months. He kicked our first with a great solo effort running laterally along the 50-metre arc with Taylor; chasing a clearance he tapped it to himself, reversed and broke out of the Taylor tackle, outran Curtis and finished neatly on the left. Maybe he’s cleaner than we (mostly I) give him credit for. This is how guys like him have elevated their game to take us to 8-3.

Highlights for the first half were almost exclusively confined to the first few goals of the game. North took it straight out of the middle and Zurhaar offered a solo effort of his own, burning Sinclair and dodging Wilkie in the pocket, before we nabbed our second thanks to Max taking another step to fulfilling our wildest desires with a one-handed juggling mark in front of goal.

North were matching us early. Yet again they came up with the instant reply, straight out of the middle again, and this time it was Todd Goldstein with a nice banana from the same pocket as Zurhaar’s goal. North would actually win the clearance count 45 to 31, and it would have a lot to do with why Brad Hill and Jack Sinclair finished with the numbers they did. I’m going to do a disservice to them by not mentioning them enough this week, but surely Sinclair is leading the Trevor Baker Award right now and Brad Hill is becoming the player we hoped he’d be (Blake Acres is too, funnily enough, but on the other side of the country).

North’s short game of keepings off – at one stage it was 74 disposals to 50 as they shared the ball around – was undercut by a few moments put things where they should have been. When we actually did win a stoppage Ross accidentally kicked a goal from 65 metres out, but it came from Paddy Ryder (in a St Kilda jumper) with ruckwork-as-art at a centre wing throw-in. Ross faked a handball, outran Horne-Francis, bounced, shirked Luke Davies-Uniacke and the kick went over Long, past Max – who knows where it was supposed to go – and rolled through.

Mitchito got involved again for our fourth, with a tackle from a forward pocket throw-in, Crouch won the ball in traffic and gave it out to Paddy Ryder (for the Saints), who actually hadn’t contested the preceding ruck throw-in and he snapped the goal around the body.

Membrey won a holding-the-ball free-kick and converted and a three-goal lead had opened up without us having brought any real heat. We’d have to wait for after half-time for anything to really happen. The second quarter was really just a lot of St Kilda having the ball and a lot of missed goals; the game could have been wrapped up by half-time given we had multiple set shots from no difficult angles and North could only manage one behind. King took a now-almost-trademark grab at the unreachable point thanks to an excellent pass from Membrey, in a chain created from a – dare I say it – NWM-esque pass by Seb Ross out of defence to Windhager, but he ended his run of seven straight kicks; Zak Jones shanked one to the left and Windhager shanked one harder and put it out on the full. Sharman finally snuck one through, taking a high mark (Derm in special comments was very impressed) and a give-off to Sinclair, and like Max he marked the ball at the highest point. He did his absolutely best to force it left too, but it snuck in.

***

You wouldn’t want this kind of game at 4.40pm on a Sunday. Having this on a beautiful late-autumn afternoon at 1.10pm tucked under the roof in TV studio lighting was already treating it with the disdain it deserved, but it would be a true grind if this was played in the depths of the weekend (and I don’t have kids; that’s a whole other planet of footy logistics for me).

It wasn’t all dour footy, it was just played at a middling pace, with one team keeping the opposition at arm’s length. Hill and Sinclair were everywhere and providing some liveliness (David King declared we have the best half-back pairing in the competition in the wash-up). Their numbers by the end of the game were fantastic (32 disposals, 10 marks and 764 metres gained for Sincs; 33 touches, a goal, 664 metres gained and 10 coaches’ votes for Hill), perhaps partly because of North winning the clearance providing more work for the back half, but we had accountant-turned-bounty hunter Callum Wilkie roaming around and taking 12 marks, Josh Battle running back into the path of Larkey, and Dougal keeping Larkey to two touches. This wasn’t sizzling, there was no sizzle, but there also wasn’t anything to worry about.

The bull run did eventually come, but not in the thunderous way it did against say the Cats a few weeks ago. Windhager made up for his miss and kicked a set shot goal; his teammates got around him more for his second-ever goal than his first, perhaps making up for barely acknowledging his first against the Dees a few weeks ago. The margin had snuck out to 33 points by this point. A wayward Sinclair ball ended up with Ziebell lining up for goal in his 250th. Dwayne, ever the optimist for low-key matches in poor timeslots in artificial lighting, declared “this is huge, this is massive”. Dwayne brings energy, sometimes he brings too much energy and sometimes too much misplaced energy.

We replied with another goal that felt more like another accident than the unadulterated silk that was about to be on display. Paddy Ryder (St Kilda) and Wood broke on the wing and Max halved the contest and Gresham was at the fall running towards the boundary and got tackled without it by Hayden. He lined up to curl it around from the pocket and his shallow kick unimpressively fell over the line. It was still enough to elicit a smile from goal umpire David Rodan, and enough to elicit a “That’s crazy good!” from Dwayne, even though it went through largely because Rowan Marshall just happened to be physically existing in the way of Hayden and Walker, and Goldstein forgot where he was.

It was time for a few highlights. It’s hard to get our head around the party tricks of 2004 being that long ago now but this was the first time since then we had this many young guys making a fun impact on the game (although the Riewoldt generation this is not). The most replayed moment, rightfully, has been NWM’s kick to Max. Some traffic in the forward 50 line had pressure on the North defenders coming from all of Jones, Mitchito, Long, and Gresham, and Scott’s rushed kick out was marked at 60 by NWM. He patiently waited for some movement and Max was again set for one of his leads from the pocket, but it took a fingerpoint from NWM (in his ninth game) to get him going. The bullet kick barely scraped Max King Reaching Height and was one of the prettiest things that happened in red, white and black since the GT and Ross eras, echoing the best of Hayes and Harvey to Riewoldt and Gehrig; Harvey to Lockett; Winmar to Lockett. It was the kind of kick that literally and metaphorically cuts through a game. This match hadn’t been hitting any fantastical highs but the urgency lifted from this point. Max took it right out in front, and went back and gave it the finish it deserved. It would be part of four goals in eight and a half minutes and 6.2 for the quarter.

NWM’s game also included a four-bounce sprint along the members’ wing before he ran into trouble (although there wasn’t anyone really giving him anything), and almost a thrilling first quarter goal from a crumb from a high spoil, before he turned left, then right, and then right some more and lined up but missed (for some reason, he just can’t quite settle in front of goal). He also offered an already-trademark bullet to Marshall on the wing in the last quarter. Yowza.

The next was a little more fortuitous but had a fun result. There was not quite a Max King quarter – there was as much a Max King quarter as much as there was a Mitchito Owens quarter, as much as there was a Mitchito Owens minute, that took the margin from 39 to 51 points and well and truly shut the game. All three of this year’s debutants were involved in varying ways for the first. Windhager was caught holding the ball at half-back, Hayden went laterally and the footy fell straight to NWM on the arc. He had King available with an arguably easier kick than what was required a few moments earlier, or he had Long over the top, and he kicked it straight to Turner in between them. Turner spilled it, in only a way that a defender playing for a team anchored so low can (we’ve been there before ourselves), and Long swooped and fed it out to Mitchito, who calmly, off a step, curled the ball through for his first goal. A light show and a team celebration for the 18-year-old.

At the following bounce, Horne-Francis came through the middle but was worried out of it by Paddy Ryder (of the St Kilda Football Club) and Paddy collected the ball that was meant for Tarryn Thomas and gave off to Jones. Young stuck out a hand to Zak’s kick and gathered the ball but it came out in a Long tackle – possibly before or after Young outright spilled the ball himself, and Mitchito reacted fastest and kicked the ball off the ground through for his second in just over 20 seconds of play. As it goes these days it was time to immediately come off the ground, and this time he got a light show an ovation from the crowd. As well as the two goals he finished with 10 tackles, playing the kind of game we thought he’d play when we called him a “bull” and “contested beast” (a little bit like Windhager).

Goldstein put in his shot for mark of the year over Mason Wood, getting as high as someone that big probably can. Trying to shake the stepladder stigma, Mason found the ball on the wing and launched forward to all of King, Marshall, Ryder, Sharman and Membrey. None of them could take the mark but in the traffic Marshall cut off the handball to Hayden and gave it out to Max. Max pirouetted onto his left and slotted it around his body, yet again doing the things we’ve been projecting that he’d be doing since we drafted him, this one a moment of agility belying his size.

Rich and I discussed after the game that it is becoming possibly apparent (??) that this rope-a-dope business might actually be by design. As the Melbourne game showed (Collingwood too), there is huge risk involved if you let a team get too far ahead, but we’ve pulled out several game-changing third quarters (Rounds 1 – even though we used up all our magic – and 2, 3, 6, 9 and now 11) and fourth quarters (Rounds 3, 4 and 10). We’re obviously backing our fitness to run out games, but seven of our eight wins (plus the Collingwood game, plus some decent second-half footy against the Dees) have had a defining second-half run. Through a quasi-retrospective mid-season review lens: It’s been fun, once it’s actually materialised.

***

The final quarter was played at the pace of an afterthought, as if we everyone was really just waiting to take in the last bit of sunshine before winter officially set in. Hill (courtesy of an excellent Gresham double attack and Mitchito aerial effort) curled through a nice goal; Marshall roved and kicked a replica after Ben Long chased the ball hardest and spun on the spot; D-Mac gave away another 50; Long helped set up another goal by attacking the ball from a throw-in and taking the tackle, a fast handball to Mitchito, and quick hands from Seb to Zak Jones and an excellent pass to Membrey on the lead. Curtis kicked straight to NWM in the last 40 seconds, Sinclair ran past and lobbed a high ball, Membrey was goalside and marked and gave to Gresham running past into an open goal. Gresh actually ended up with the ball on the siren and played on (his kick was nowhere near it either way); for hardcore fans of score lines this created the first-ever game in VFL/AFL history that finished with a final score of 103 to 50.

We probably could have gone a little bigger with the margin if we’re wanting to be totally uncompromising and ruthless. What decadence to have this moment in which we are able to say that. We won the first quarter by three goals and won the third by 25 points, but the second and fourth were a little tighter. Not tighter in the way that it was a highly pressurised game, just tighter in the can-we-really-be-arsed way. We didn’t have to fear the repercussions of the media pile-on or a club in crisis ready to lash out or a tyre fire getting out of hand. We did what we had to do.

Freo appeared to have denied us the chance to claim the very small marker of being in the top four at the halfway point of the season, but they temporarily allowed just that little bit of belief that yes, the Dees can be beaten, and rather than a race of one with a trailing group it’s a race of one, still, but that trailing group might be a little closer. Then the Blues lost anyway. So yes, we are in the top four at the halfway mark of the season.

The absence of Jack Steele will be more telling after the bye but there is plenty to like. Right now, we have Max King (who I still can’t fully enjoy because I’m worried he’s going to get injured), we have a team playing selfless footy, we have everyone playing their role, we have players improving, we have three first-year players making genuine impacts. Save for pissing away a win in Cairns we’d be a game off top spot. To boot, Sandy is third on the VFL ladder, behind only Melbourne’s Casey and, uh, Southport. 

***

It’s about this time of year we get to the “every week” of “supporting the team every week”. Feeling the cold. Catching the tram to the game. Meeting the people you watch the game with on the Bourke Street bridge. Getting a Parma at Platform 28. Getting the drinks. Lining up for too long to go to the bathroom because Marvel’s getting redone. And there’s no guarantee of an enthralling game, or a Saints win. By now, the game itself doesn’t have its early-season novelty. Days of listening to Whateley into Midday Madness and nights of watching 360 bleed into each other.

And just as we settle into it all, we run into a bye. We’re going to need it. And I mean, we as fans are going to need it. The second half of the year isn’t going to be easy in any way. We’ve set it up so that if we finish top four it’s going to be exhausting and emotional, and if we fall out of the top four it’s going to be exhausting and emotional. We haven’t exercised this supporting muscle for a long time.

Two seasons ago we were second on the ladder after Round 10 of a 17-match season; last year it was a second-half turnaround that had us within touching distance of the finals. Here’s hoping we can put together both halves, plus finals, this year.

In the meantime, make the most of the bye.